S-A-H-M: You do not earn income. Surirumah sepenuh masa.
W-A-H-M: You earn money but does not have to commute on a daily basis because her "office" is her house - online business, ambil tempahan membuat kek, dll.
This is such a hard topic for me. I'm a WAHM. Kalau dulu, saya seorang wanita bekerja yang sibuk dengan projek mengejar deadline di pejabat dan ada kalanya perlu outstation sana-sini tapi sekarang, most of the time saya berada di rumah. Sesekali akan keluar bila ada appointment Public Mutual dengan clients atau aktiviti berkaitan Tisha's sekiranya jarak lokasi bersesuaian dengan saya. Saya ambil keputusan berhenti kerja bukan sebab didesak oleh sesiapa termasuk Mik tetapi ianya 💯 kehendak saya sendiri untuk menumpukan sepenuh masa kepada keluarga selepas Qaiser lahir. Walaupun pada masa tu gaji saya boleh dikatakan lebih besar dari Mik di tambah pula kami takde komitment hutang seperti kereta contohnya kerana kami masing-masing memandu kereta pemberian keluarga masing-masing, saya nekad. 5 bulan selepas itu, saya mengandungkan Mysha pula. Rezeki yang tak diduga. Kah kah kah.
It is really hard to balance everything as the majority of my work is done during naptime and after QQ goes to bed. I'm lucky that my job allows me to work at any time of the day or night. I enjoy it and get a lot satisfaction from working. The downside is that I feel like an Energizer bunny that has been run over by a garbage truck. I'd love to stay at home with QQ but still earn my own money to spend as I please.
Being a SAHM/WAHM is challenging. It can be isolating and lonely. I mean, you are never physically alone. Ada masanya saya akan rasa macam otak tak normal sebab seharian bergaul dengan anak kecil. I do get to keep in touch with friends via social media but sometimes it is hard to find other adults to have an "adult conversation" with. Saya rasa bersyukur setiap kali Mik balik dari kerja sebab ada orang dewasa yang boleh diajak berbual. No more gugu-gaga-cak-cikabom conversation. Mik pula memang rajin bercerita apa yang dia buat seharian di pejabat.
Semasa bekerja, kita akan ada me-time semasa lunch terutamanya hari Jumaat sebab waktu rehat panjang kan. Boleh la nak pergi window shopping ke lepak-lepak makan dengan colleagues sambil ambil gambar flatlay makanan dan OOTD ke tapi bila anda pegang jawatan SAHM/WAHM ni, you have no time for yourself. NO ME-TIME!!! You share every meal and every moment with your little munchkins. Every trip to the bathroom becomes a full-on family potty party 🚽🚿 😒 dan setiap kali nak memasak di dapur, rasa macam pergi camping pula ⛺
Saya kurang selesa dengan persepsi SAHM/WAHM ni pathetic, loser, tak menyumbang apa-apa kepada keluarga dan mengharap duit suami je sedangkan pada zaman nenek kita dahulu majoriti isteri seorang surirumah. Saya selalu dapat 2 reaksi berbeza dari 2 generasi umur berbeza. Kalau yang sebaya saya Gen-Y ni, mereka akan katakan yang saya beruntung tetapi kalau yang lebih tua, biasanya saya dapat pandangan sinis dari makcik bawang dan soalan kegemaran mereka "Tak kerja ke?". Selalunya saya cuma senyum dan bagi business card, nanti pandai-pandai la mereka diam. Saya selalu mengadu tentang hal ni pada Mik tapi Alhamdulillah beliau sangat positif dan banyak bagi kata-kata semangat. Dari awal lagi beliau bagi sokongan 💯 untuk saya duduk di rumah kerana pada pada dia, personal touch seorang Ibu tak sama dengan menghantar anak ke nursery.
Duit. Duit juga salah satu point yang perlu diambil kira sekiranya seorang working mom ingin berhenti bekerja. Anda bekerja, anda ada gaji tetap tapi bila anda seorang WAHM, pendapatan anda boleh naik dan turun sebab anda berniaga sendiri. InsyaAllah suami takkan lupa bagi nafkah tetapi bila kita dah biasa pegang duit sendiri dan sekarang income tak menentu, anda perlu adapt dengan keadaan itu.
Know the top 5 benefits and downsides before you make the transition from 9-5 working mom to SAHM/WAHM.
1. You're Always There
Pro
Chances are good that you will always be there when your child needs you as opposed to being stuck in a cubicle at work.
Con
Always being there can sometimes feel like you're trapped. You may love being a stay-at-home mom but there will be times when you wish you could steal some moments for yourself, which is why me-time is so important to any parent, especially SAHM/WAHM.
2. You're Never Alone
Pro
Your kids are with you almost every hour of the day. You're there for everything -- first steps, first words, first skinned knees.
Con
You're never alone, as in most of the time you can't even go to the bathroom by yourself. When you can laugh about it, that's when you know you're a SAHM/WAHM.
3. You are Raising Your Child
Pro
Your children are with you a majority of the time so you won't feel like a day care worker is raising them.
Con
It's easy to create your own bubble and isolate yourself as well as your kids from the outside world. Get together with your mom friends and schedule play dates to make sure you are exposing all of you to social environments as you raise your family.
4. You are Master of Your House
Pro
You run the house. Cooking, cleaning, getting the kids everywhere they need to be and keeping the family schedule is all under your control.
Con
You may feel like it all falls on you. Even if your spouse is the world's best teammate, there will be times you feel super-stressed trying to keep up with it all while raising kids.
5. You Experience Different Stress Levels
Pro
If you love every aspect of parenting your child and can even smile on the inside when your toddler is in full meltdown mode, then your stress level will probably be much lower than if you were having to raise your family while working outside the home.
Con
Kids can be more than a handful and their fighting, misbehavior, your family living on one income and feeling like you have your family's success or failure riding on your shoulders can send your stress level through the roof. You have to find your happy place several times a day to keep your wits.
There are many pluses of being a SAHM/WAHM, there are also many downsides. A SAHM/WAHM is a completely new lifestyle that you may not be used to and losing touch with friends whose goals are now different than your own. You have to know what you're getting into and you have to be prepared for a completely different world than you're probably used to if you've been climbing the corporate ladder.
Not only does this means you'll need to talk everything over with your spouse, you'll also need to take a look at your family budget. Those may just be the easy parts because you'll also need to understand how to survive the SAHM/WAHM life while also asking yourself if you're cut out to be a SAHM/WAHM, something you may not truly know until you've already quit your job and become a SAHM/WAHM.
To all SAHM/WAHM out there, can you relate? What say you?
